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Saturday, April 25, 2015

the boy is dead, stop killing him.....


Should we mourn shadows.....?
My oldest friend Phil Thex-Fireman got the all-clear regarding his 10 month chemo& radiotherapy for throat cancer.
above a  few photos of  a night out we had in Hebden Bridge .
This is a sepia saturday post. 
Regular readers here will remember me talk in the past about our ten year old cat Chaz. I am sad .We had to put him to sleep yesterday.
 An outdoor cat.He roamed the fields of Hebden Bridge & must have killed hundreds of mice,birds,rats,
voles& jesus knows what else  over the years.
I remember him killing a rabbit the same size as himself:half-eating it : leaving the remains under Chris's bed as a present.
OnThursday,me & Chris held him as the vet gave him the lethal injection.
As Chaz's  eyes closed for the last time ,i was hoping his victims were not lined up in heaven awaiting his arrival .......
I found the theatre & poetry surprisingly moving.
 When I worked as a 17 year old Nurse at Stansfield View Hospital ,Todmorden i remember laying a patient out. I was at  by my mother's death bed. I am an orphan boy who visited Aunt Brenda & her cancer. I had a prostrate cancer scare myself 5 years ago.
I'm feeling my age...preparing for eventually departure myself.....it's not very rock and roll for a man my age to be mourning a cat's death. So Im surprised it even registered with me ,let alone giving it as the subject of a blog post.
Really ,in truth ,its not about Chaz at all ,but about another bit of life's  leaving.
it has given body to an  increasing vague fear of change...
 So!i am touched by Chaz's Thursday Sweet Surrender & grateful for the subtle shapes he threw in our lives.
When body's bricks crumble, 
don't wail
 Sir, 
you've only been in a jail ....
(RUMI)
i found this old video of Chaz,our beautiful cat .It seems youtube have removed the audio because they detected a Bob Dylan song in the background. No matter, i was talking bollocks anyway...

16 comments:

Kurt said...

Safe travels to Chaz. I'm glad I'm never going to die.

tony said...

Kurt.Lets start a new trend ,lets not die together!

Leni Qinan said...

Sorry to read you're sad. When death is near it's inevitable to think about how fragile and ephemeral life is.

I try to live in the here and now. That's all I have and will have. :)

Leni Qinan said...

oh btw, I would have loved to watch your video but YouTube has removed it -not just the audio- showing a message that goes: "this video includes Sony Music Entertainment material and therefore has been blocked for copyright reasons". Too bad!

tony said...

Sony have copyrighted my dead cat..& they wonder why i like Trotsky!
(*it does play the vision for me,but silently,hey-hoy.*)
Yea,Leni we forget how easily /quickly/suddenly we can become Abstract instead of Landscape.....

Kristin said...

I hope I feel like Rumi's poem when the time comes. My father said he was going to do breathing exercises to stave off death. It didn't work.

Ann ODyne said...

Comiseration from me dear Tony, please be cheered by the final gift of Chaz - the thought that SONY (don't mention The War) are threatened by a pet video.
I think sony bought michael jackson who had bought Lennon/McCartney. The MJ hit machine saved Sony from certain financial death prior to that btw.
Visit vanityfair.com for all the juice on the sony hack and good luck to them hackers.
This old Mod is getting affairs in order, having figured out the FearOfDeath is really only fear of not being organised for it.
RIP Chaz.

Ms Scarlet said...

Death, it's a right pain in the arse.
RIP Chaz.
Sx

Barbara Rogers said...

Hail to the life of those we loved, and released into the ethers...hold tight to the memories (even if the videos may be missing) through sharing with friends. Me, I'm going to just live a day at a time, for as long as it happens!

La Nightingail said...

I have no idea when my time might come - my mother will soon be celebrating her 97th birthday & she's still going strong. We're all amazed! All I know is - right up until my last breath, I will have interesting things still to do - projects of one sort of another still waiting to be completed. I never want to be done with things. I'll always want something new around the corner just waiting for me! Sorry about Chaz, though. We've had to put down 3 cats & it's never easy. But I'm so glad we've had them to love!

Helen Bauch McHargue said...

I think it's very rock and roll to mourn your cat. Much sympathy on your loss and I too hope his victims aren't waiting for him.

Alan Burnett said...

Lovely old photo Tony. And it seems just about the right week to be remembering our NHS and trying to make sure it survives whatever might happen on Thursday.

Mike Brubaker said...

Cats show us what is good in life and help us to appreciate creatures superior to ourselves.

Joan said...

Today, methinks, you gave ups poetry in photos, words and thoughts. Thanks, to you and Chaz

boundforoz said...

That Boy with Ball wouldn't be anywhere near as interesting if it were in colour. I don't know what it is is but all the oolours seem to distract you from the content and shapes in the image. A great photo.

Tattered and Lost said...

I understand completely and I'm sorry for you loss. Each year Christmas seems to happen sooner and sooner which means each year has passed and I am one toe, one foot, one something closer to the end. I scare myself when I look at the obit page.